Sally Benefield has been working in the school system for almost thirty years. She was an early education teacher for 14 years, she spent 15 years as a school counselor, and was even a part of her school district’s trauma team. As a teacher and a school counselor, she has seen her fair share of first days, and witnessed many children go through the process of adjusting to or back to the routine of school.
Every parent sends their child off to school on the first day hoping their child has an enjoyable experience. What if that child has a negative first day experience, causing them to not want to go back to school? What should the parent do from there? This is what she had to say on the subject:
“First, think back about maybe something you said or did to contribute to the anxiety and correct that if possible. Maybe crying or showing your anxiety? It’s contagious! At least wait until your out of sight (ha!) You would not believe how kids worry about you sometimes when out of sight.
Here are a few pointers for making things a little smoother. The great thing is that you get to start over every day (something to teach kids too):
Prepare Your Child As Much As Possible For Their Day
Talk about what might happen the next day. If it helps, rehearse what your child would do in scenarios that may worry them.
Make Sure Your Child Gets Enough Sleep
It’s hard enough for an adult to have a good day on little sleep, it’s almost impossible for a child. If it’s possible, start a good sleep routine a couple weeks before school starts. Make sure your child is getting the recommended amount of sleep for their age.
Prepare For The Upcoming Day The Night Before
Let your child take charge of the next school day by letting them pick out their clothes, pack their backpack and lunch. Together, you and your child can make sure they are ready for the next day.
Talk About All The Fun Things That Could Happen
Remind your child about all the good things that could happen the next school day. “Your child could make a new friend, you could play a fun game, or you can learn something new.”
Make Drop-Offs Short And Sweet
How you drop off your child can set the tone for the rest of their day. Stay as positive as you can. Let your child know you love them and when you will pick them up. Do not linger! Don’t try to watch your child from the window. You can always call to check on them later.
Ask Positive Questions At Pick-Up
Keep things positive at pick-up. “What awesome things did you do today?” “What great things happened today?” Don’t focus on the negative.
Remind Them That Every Day Is A New Day
This is something everyone can keep in mind. Remind your child that every day brings new possibilities. Get your child excited about what might happen.
Get Help If You Need It
If your child still struggles with wanting to go to school after a couple of weeks, you may want to make an appointment with their teacher or the school counselor. These individuals could be your greatest resource.
“Kids, just like us, will have rough days. Always help them to remember tomorrow is a new day.”
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