We, as parents, try to convince our children of how amazing they are. We want them to be confident in who they are regardless of what the world tries to tell them. One day I realized if I wanted my kids to live this way, why was I not living this myself?
So many of us are stuck in this mindset that we can’t see ourselves as perfect. What are we afraid of? Who are we going to offend with our new positive sense of self?
Who Determines Where You Fall On The Scale?
So many factors go into how we see ourselves. How many of those factors are negative feedback from others? Another scary question would be, “how much positive feedback do we let shape our self worth?” Whether positive or negative, why do we let others label us with a numerical value. What happens when one person says you’re a 9.9, but someone else says you’re a 7.2. Then a few days later, you’re labelled a 3. That seems exhausting to keep up with. You are a 10 all day, every day regardless of where you are or who you’re with. You determine your self worth, no one else.
Conceit
There is a difference between having genuine confidence in yourself and being conceited. Conceit is comparing yourself to everyone else in the room. Conceit requires you to break others down in order to build yourself up. A person that is truly confident in themselves doesn’t compare themselves to anyone. Their self worth is the same regardless of who they’re standing next to. Confident individuals don’t need to break others down, and are actually more likely to build up the people around them.
Humility
Humility is an admirable quality, but we have the wrong idea of what true humility is. Humility is not self-deprecating or self-loathing. Humility is the ability to recognize and celebrate the strengths of others. Humility allows you to be inspired by others.
Flaws
No one is absolutely flawless. You will always be able to find flaws if you look hard enough. Also, always keep in mind what might be a flaw to someone else might not be a flaw to you. Flaws should not define self worth. You need to separate the two.
Treating Yourself Like A 10
No amount of fixing flaws is going to make you feel like a 10, if you’re always in the mindset that you are “fixing” yourself. 10s aren’t broken. 10s don’t need “fixing”. A 10 can take steps to better themselves. Someone who thinks of themselves as a 10, will invest time and energy into themselves, because they are worth it. Treating yourself like a 10 means taking care of yourself and putting back into you, whether that be physically, emotionally, intellectually, or spiritually.
Hard Work
This is not an easy flip of a switch. It requires a good deal of mindfulness and practice. There are days when you will feel like a 10, and then there are days you will feel like a 3.7. I am a strong believer in fake it till you make it. In order to change your mindset, you have to change your practice. There will be days where others will sabotage your thinking, and days where you will sabotage yourself. Just keep coming back to the fact that you control your self perception. You are amazing, and there’s really no good reason to see yourself as anything less.
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